Valentine's Day, celebrated on February 14, has become synonymous with commercialization and societal expectations, leading to diverse reactions around the world. While many will engage with the tradition—exchanging gifts and romantic gestures—others question the pressure and motives behind the holiday.
According to estimates, Valentine's celebrations will see 60% of the UK populace partake this year, with each person spending roughly £52 on gifts, from flowers to chocolates and everything else romantic. Similarly, the U.S. is projected to contribute about $27 billion, inclusive of around $500 million dedicated just to roses!
The historical roots of Valentine’s Day trace back to St. Valentine, who was martyred for performing forbidden marriages. By the late 14th century, the day began shifting from merely honoring this saint to celebrating romantic love, catalyzed by poets like Geoffrey Chaucer, who highlighted the day’s association with affection in his work, Parliament of Fowls.
The 19th century industrial revolution solidified Valentine’s Day as we know it today. Cadbury was the first to commercialize this romantic association by creating heart-shaped chocolate boxes, now emblematic of the holiday. This idea would be boosted with the introduction of Valentine’s postcards and greeting cards sold by Hallmark, leading to the annual exchange of approximately 145 million cards—making it the second biggest card-giving occasion after Christmas.
While businesses have long capitalized on love’s commercialization—such as IKEA’s partnership with dating apps this year and Coca-Cola’s themed drive-thru experiences—cultural variations hint at the holiday’s expansive nature. For example, traditions differ vastly across the globe. Japan observes it as two-fold, with women giving 'giri-choco' or 'obligation chocolate' to friends and colleagues on February 14, followed by 'white day' on March 14, when men reciprocate with gifts. South Korea mirrors this, adding 'Black Day' on April 14, when singles gather to eat black noodles together.
Meanwhile, Finland and Estonia focus on friendship, deeming February 14 as 'Friend’s Day', celebrating platonic love rather than romantic sentiments. The rise of 'Galentine’s Day', popularized by the TV show Parks and Recreation, has also gained traction, allowing women to cherish their friendships without any romantic connection. Corporate marketing aside, not everyone feels the warmth of Valentine’s Day. For some, the day brings anxiety similar to the pressure felt during big societal events—pointing out the sense of obligation associated with extravagant displays of love.
One blogger shared her past experiences, stating, "This holiday (intended to remind me of how loved I am) ended up making me feel the complete opposite: pressured, anxious, and oddly disconnected." This sentiment highlights the struggle many face when trying to meet high expectations linked to such commercialized love expressions.
Conversely, others have shared their fondness for the holiday, addressing critics head-on. One writer expressed, "I like to hand over a fistful of flowers and tell someone I love them." This advocates celebrating love, albeit to one’s own liking and interpretation, unbound by commercial constraints. The beauty of expressing love should not solely rely on obligatory gifts or arrangements.
What unites naysayers and supporters alike is the desire to experience genuine love. They might define it differently, but the goal remains the same: finding authentic ways to connect with loved ones.
This Valentine's Day, those uncomfortable with tradition are encouraged to break from expectations. Skip the lavish dinners or extravagant gifts and opt for quiet moments together—maybe rent your favorite movie or make dinner at home. The aim is not to denigrate the holiday but rather to embrace what feels right for you.
Indeed, when exploring how we want to celebrate love, we validate our personal connections and resist the commercial tide. Balancing these conflicting perspectives could be the key to redefining the day for future celebrations, taking the focus off pressure and placing it back on the essence of love—genuine and heartfelt connections.