This Valentine’s Day serves as both a celebration and, for some, a source of stress and humor. While many couples seek romantic expressions of love, others find themselves reconsidering the holiday altogether, with creative and sometimes biting takes on the occasion.
One of the most fascinating events taking place is T&D’s Cats of the World wildlife sanctuary’s fundraising campaign, where participants can symbolically send their exes to feed the wolves. Founded during the pandemic, this quirky and humorous event invites individuals to submit their exes' names, which are then inscribed on peanut butter cookies shaped like gingerbread men. Co-owner Jennifer Mattive explained, “An ex-girlfriend, boyfriend, boss, spouse, roommate, the sky’s the limit for an ex, so we’ll put their name to... and then we toss them to the wolves on Valentine’s Day.” The event aims not only to provide catharsis through humor but also to raise funds to care for the sanctuary’s many animals. The wolves will have their feast on February 14, and photos will be shared on the sanctuary’s Facebook page, allowing participants to revel vicariously in the night’s activities.
But the holiday isn’t just about playful revenge; it also brings pressure to perform romantic gestures. Professor Benjamin Karney from UCLA noted how Valentine’s Day, now valued at $28 billion—with half of this spending on candy—can induce anxiety among couples. He suggested, “True love is expressed more by the way we treat our partners day after day than the way we treat them on any single day.” This insight pushes back against societal expectations, encouraging couples to appreciate their everyday partnerships rather than focus on extravagant displays.
For some, Valentine’s Day becomes about breaking norms rather than adhering to them. A personal account from 2015 reveals how one individual, residing with friends who were romantically involved, embraced the holiday by proposing they watch not one but three movies together on Valentine’s Day. The night, described as “an anti-Valentine’s Day,” culminated with them sneaking between screenings—although the plan unraveled as they only made it through one movie. This playful anecdote highlights how community and friendship can reframe the holiday’s narrative, providing solace for those who feel left out of conventional romance.
Conversely, Valentine’s Day can evoke uncomfortable feelings, particularly for singles or those recently out of relationships. The holiday is often criticized for emphasizing romantic love over the many other forms of affection present in life. One article noted the discomfort some people experienced following Deliveroo's promotional campaign, which involved sending seemingly anonymous Valentine’s Day letters featuring discounts on flowers. Recipients were left puzzled and unsettled. “I feel far from a valued customer—this campaign left me mortified and angry,” one recipient declared, showing how marketing strategies can sometimes backfire painfully, particularly for those not currently entrenched in romance.
Another consideration is the restaurant industry's chaos during this holiday, often marked by overwhelming reservations and painfully cliché menus. Chefs like Paul Bentley explain why they opt to skip the Valentine’s Day rush entirely, stating, “The people... are trying to check a box. They’re not our regular clientele... they feel obliged to celebrate it.” Instead, some experts suggest going out to eat on the 15th, where the ambiance is calmer and the food is often much tastier.
Hospitality professionals recounted their own Valentine’s Day horror stories; for example, one tale involved a groom-to-be falling ill from peanuts, which threw his elaborate proposal plan awry. “We ended up comping their bill... even though it was his fault. The paperwork was monumental,” recalled one staff member, highlighting how expectations can lead to disaster. But not all events are negative; some chefs report enjoying their shifts due to the rise of ‘anti-Valentine’s Day’ customer groups—typically made up of women gathering for friendship rather than romance.
Across the board, it’s clear Valentine’s Day elicits varied responses, from whimsical and empowering to exhausting and stressful. Instead of adhering to the traditional notion of love and sentiment associated with the day, many are choosing to redefine how they engage, whether it’s through humor, solidarity, or opting out altogether. This shift suggests the potential for Valentine’s Day to serve as inclusive rather than prescriptive—a broader reflection of affection beyond romantic relationships. Whether treating oneself, celebrating friendships, or recognizing the humor (or absurdity) of the holiday, individuals are increasingly focused on what feels genuine for them.