A young sports coach was tragically killed in a horrifying incident at St Andrew's Cathedral School in Sydney, where her ex-boyfriend bludgeoned her to death with a hammer. Lilie James, just 21, was brutally murdered by 24-year-old Paul Thijssen on October 25, 2023, days after she ended their casual relationship, which had been marked by jealousy and coercive control.
This grim story unfolded, according to the counsel assisting the coroner, Jennifer Single SC, during an ongoing inquest into their deaths. Thijssen's control over James escalated to fatal consequences when he attacked her in a bathroom less than an hour after sending deceptive text messages to her father to lure him away from the scene.
Before her death, Lilie had texted her father, asking him to come to the school, stating, “Don’t ask why or call. Please come to the school now and pick me up.” Alarmingly, this message was sent while she was already dead, and investigators determined that only Thijssen could have sent it. Her father tried to reach her for confirmation but received a follow-up text saying: “All good just came trouble (sic).” This crisis response left her family in a frantic state as they desperately searched for her.
Witness accounts and CCTV footage presented during the inquest revealed the harrowing moments leading up to the murder. The footage showed Lilie smiling and chatting with Thijssen before she walked towards the bathroom, seemingly unaware of the impending danger. She carried her swimsuit while looking at a sign blocking off an entrance, one placed there earlier by Thijssen. He followed her inside, holding a hammer that had been previously practiced with outside the bathroom.
Upon entering, Thijssen subjected Lilie to a premeditated attack; forensic psychiatrist Danny Sullivan noted that her rejection after a two-month relationship likely triggered Thijssen’s violent response. In an act of vengeance, he struck her at least 25 times, resulting in extensive injuries that rendered her unrecognizable when police arrived on the scene.
After the attack, Thijssen reportedly called emergency services, notifying them: “You’ll find a body inside the gym bathroom,” but did not disclose his identity. He later took his own life at the base of a cliff in Sydney's eastern suburbs hours later, prompting questions during the inquest about whether his death was self-inflicted.
Counsel Single passionately remarked, “No matter how many times you see that footage, it is not easy to watch,” highlighting the inexplicable nature of Thijssen's actions, particularly as Lilie displayed no signs of distress or expectation of danger during their final interactions.
Further examination of the case revealed that Thijssen had a history of controlling behavior during their relationship, which included repeated calls and attempts to isolate James from other men. This pattern of coercive control often leaves victims trapped in toxic relationships, making it more imperative for society to address the underlying issues contributing to such tragedies.
As the inquest continues, officials will also consider broader societal implications regarding relationship behavior, focusing on the necessity to recognize and mitigate coercive control in romantic interactions.
The tragic death of Lilie James serves as a stark reminder of the dangers that can arise from unchecked jealousy and control in relationships. The inquest aims to shed light not only on this heart-wrenching case, but also on how society can come together to prevent similar incidents in the future.
