A growing number of single women are embracing fertility treatments as they pursue parenthood independently, viewing the experience as empowering and sometimes even liberatory. This shift reflects not only personal choices but also changing societal norms around family structures, as more women seek options like IVF (in vitro fertilization) and donor insemination.
Amy, 45, is one of those women. After contemplating her options during the pandemic, she decided to have a child on her own. "I had been thinking about it for a long time," Amy reminisced. And once the isolation of lockdowns filled her with urgency, she struck lucky with her first embryo transfer. Today, she is the proud single mother of a three-year-old, relishing her life as it is. "I feel very blessed," she said, emphasizing the lack of guilt she holds for not being coupled up when making this decision.
The statistics tell the story—according to the latest report from the Human Fertilisation and Embryology Authority (HFEA), the number of single women undergoing fertility treatments has surged dramatically. Back in 2012, there were around 1,400 treatments for women without partners. By 2022, this number ballooned to 4,800, showcasing a staggering 243% increase. It's also notable to mention the treatment has become more common among same-sex couples, doubling to approximately 3,300 treatments released over the same period.
Many fertility clinics have noted the societal impacts of the pandemic on this trend. Dr. Lucy Richardson from the Herts and Essex fertility center explained, "COVID had quite the impact on the number of single women seeking IVF treatment." With more individuals experiencing reflection during lockdown, many women began reassessing their lives and decisions. She added, "We were all locked down, examining our lives and what we wanted for the future.”
Single mothers often find the IVF process more straightforward than traditional couples with partners might experience. With no partner to navigate relationship dynamics or emotional fluctuations inherent to shared treatment journeys, women like Amy revel in complete autonomy throughout the IVF process. "I think doing it without a partner is probably easier," she mentioned, sharing how it allowed her to focus on the treatment without the emotional pressure of involving someone else.
This notion of affirmation among women aspiring to motherhood on their terms resonates with Emma, another woman who spoke candidly about her fertility experiences. Feeling supported by her same-sex partner’s stance, Emma feels encouraged by the rising visibility of single mothers turning to treatments. "I’m glad it’s becoming more common because I think the biggest hindrance for women considering this has been the stigma and shame attached to it,” she shared.
Reportedly, the societal attitudes are shifting, particularly as figures depict increased receptiveness and support from healthcare providers for diverse family formations. The HFEA has recognized this necessity, emphasizing their commitment to ensuring clinic information covers the wide diversity of individuals seeking fertility treatments.
The financial aspect of these treatments remains another significant hurdle. Many women are funding their journeys through personal means or support from family, with some using inherited funds to cover the costs. Charlotte Dunn, 38, shared her story of expenditure around £20,000 on treatments, including IUI (intrauterine insemination) and IVF cycles. "I always knew I wanted to be a mum, and after struggling to find someone to settle down with, I decided to move forward on my own," Charlotte explained.
Her path had its ups and downs; after multiple unsuccessful attempts at IUI, Charlotte underwent surgery for ovarian cysts, which posed challenges for her fertility. Nevertheless, she persisted, and after her second IVF attempt, she achieved her dream of becoming a parent to her daughter Thea, who is now five months old. "It’s comforting to know there are options out there. Less stigma is attached with each passing day," Charlotte shared, expressing contentment with her experience.
Meanwhile, disparity persists with access and funding. While the National Health Service (NHS) funding for fertility treatments is dwindling, with just 27% of IVF cycles being NHS-funded, women without partners have continued to face additional barriers. Regionally, access strategies vary across England, Scotland, Wales, and Northern Ireland.
The regulatory setup doesn’t provide equal opportunities, with the HFEA noting only partial funding is available for single women depending on local healthcare provider regulations—a more complicated maze for those already facing the prospect of raising children independently.
Sarah Lambert from the charity Gingerbread reiterates the importance of acknowledging and normalizing diverse family units. “Families come in all shapes and sizes, and the biggest difference for children’s well-being stems from the quality of relationships, not their structures,” Lambert said, reinforcing the need for equitable discussions and access to resources regardless of parenting situations.
But it is not only single women who can benefit; the characteristics of the parents are changing among those accessing IVF treatments. Data indicates most women opting for these treatments are over the age of 36, with many prioritizing career advancements and personal achievements before family life. The changing demography of parenthood has initiated discussions around egg freezing as women look to expand their fertility options for the future.
Dr. Richardson highlighted the rising trend of women physiologically delaying pregnancy; about 89% of egg freezing cycles are currently performed on single women—signifying awareness is growing around resources entrusted to them. Yet, she cautioned, seeking professional fertility assessments is imperative, as many misconceive their situations prematurely. "It's important to understand your fertility thoroughly," Dr. Richardson stated.
Despite these advancements and shifts, hurdles remain. Single women and same-sex couples often confront hidden stigmas within healthcare systems, which can inadvertently impede access to needed services. Advocates continue to call for uniform systems recognizing the rights of all aspiring parents through influential campaigns and continuous advocacy.
The narrative is changing, reflected through the stories of Charlotte, Amy, Emma, and others like them. Single women seeking fertility treatments are reshaping the conversation around parenthood and asserting their place within family frameworks, leading the charge toward equality in access and societal perception.
Through resilience and determination, these women redefine traditional norms of parenthood, paving the way for future generations to embrace whatever family structures they may desire.
Reflecting upon her own choice guided by the belief of not compromising for the wrong reasons, Charlotte summarized, “There are roots to make family happen without rushing to decide. It’s about finding what’s right for you, even if it means doing it on your own.”
