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30 January 2025

Research Reveals Patterns Of Parental Favoritism Among Siblings

New studies show gender and personality traits greatly influence favoritism, impacting sibling dynamics.

New scientific studies have shed light on the complex dynamics of parental favoritism, finding it influenced by factors such as birth order, gender, and personality traits. A recent meta-analysis conducted by researchers from Brigham Young University (BYU) has revealed insights confirming what many have long suspected: some children may be viewed more favorably than others by their parents.

This sweeping research analyzed nearly 19,500 individuals across numerous studies from the U.S., Canada, and Western Europe published between 2015 and 2022. Its findings indicate patterns of favoritism, particularly highlighting the tendency among parents to favor daughters over sons—a trend not just driven by conscious bias, but intertwined with cultural stereotypes around gender roles.

According to Dr. Alexander Jensen, the lead author of the study, "Parents tend to favor daughters, agreeable children, and the conscientious." This reveals how personality traits play significant roles; children who are responsible, organized, and easier to manage often receive preferential treatment. Interestingly, traits typically celebrated outside family contexts, such as extroversion, were less influential concerning parental treatment.

Examining these patterns, the research found children who exhibit agreeable and conscientious behaviors are likely to be favored, regardless of their birth order. This aligns with the findings of earlier studies and tapers back to the idea of parental differential treatment (PDT). Approximately 65% of U.S. families reportedly experience some form of favoritism, affecting children's relationships and emotional well-being.

Lisa Strohschein, a sociology professor at the University of Alberta, suggests these findings reinforce narratives people already have about parental preferential treatment, though cautioning against equipping these insights as definitive. She noted, "The reasons why parents treat their children differently are likely more complex and extend beyond the factors explored in this study."

Notably, the moral dilemma surrounding favoritism can be exacerbated, as children who perceive unfair treatment often endure poorer mental health outcomes. The 2020 study highlighted by recent researchers indicated siblings who feel disadvantaged may grapple with feelings of competition or injustices, which can lead to increased risks of substance abuse or academic troubles.

This discourse brings to the forefront the importance of equity within the familial unit. For parents, recognizing patterns of favoritism isn't just about addressing perceptions among siblings; it’s pivotal to create healthy relationships and support children's psychological welfare.

Dr. Jensen explains how conversations and reflections within families can reframe dynamics. He recounts his experience with his daughter expressing concern over her younger sister's clothing allowance: "It isn’t fair, my little sister has more clothes than me. I have five dresses, and she has eight," she said. This prompted Dr. Jensen to explain the concept of hand-me-downs, leading to his daughter’s recognition of fairness upon considering the broader picture.

Overall, these studies advocate for parents' introspection, prompting discussions about the unconscious behaviors they might unknowingly exhibit, along with the potential for rectifying perceived disparities. The conclusion reached by many experts is the acknowledgment of differences among children should not stem from bias or convenience but should be approached with consideration of each child's unique needs.

While the eldest child often enjoys greater autonomy due to perceived maturity and experience, this does not translate to favoritism. The need for managing family dynamics remains imperative, with parental awareness playing a key role. Recognizing these patterns, alongside insights from modern studies, can help pave the way for nurturing environments where all children feel equally valued.

From birth order to gender and beyond, the factors influencing parental favoritism paint complex portraits of family life. The intention to treat each child fairly, grounded in awareness and openness, fosters healthier, more resilient family bonds capable of weathering the nuances of personal relationships.