Rachael Kirkconnell, known for her appearance on the reality show The Bachelor, has recently opened up about the unexpected breakup with Matt James, her boyfriend of four years. Appearing on the podcast Call Her Daddy, Kirkconnell provided insights about their relationship and detailed the emotional turmoil surrounding their split.
The breakup, which occurred during a trip to Tokyo earlier this month, caught Kirkconnell off guard. “It was definitely out of nowhere,” she stated. According to Kirkconnell, James expressed concerns about various qualities she possessed, which he felt were incompatible with his vision of a future spouse. “He said at the end of the day, there were just qualities about me he worries about having in a wife,” she explained.
This conversation culminated during what should have been a romantic dinner, where Kirkconnell was emotionally overwhelmed after struggling to find the perfect restaurant for her food influencer boyfriend, who puts significant weight on dining experiences. “Everything was fine the night before,” she recalled. “But at dinner, I started tearing up. I felt like I let him down.” Kirkconnell noted how James didn’t respond to her emotions positively, which led to tension between them.
Adding to the shock, shortly after their tear-filled dinner, James shared their breakup news on Instagram without informing Kirkconnell beforehand. The post included their photo from the Bachelor Nation mansion, captioned with, “Father God, give Rachael and I strength to mend our broken hearts.” Kirkconnell, who was on her flight back home when she saw his announcement, described this moment as particularly painful, feeling blindsided by the way their relationship ended. “He didn’t even text me to give me a warning,” she lamented. “It just hurt to know that's how my friends found out.”
Kirkconnell emphasized the degree of mutual affection and commitment they had shared before the split. She mentioned how their initial two years had been fun and rollercoaster-like, but as they approached their third year, she began to contemplate their future. “That’s when I started to just ask, ‘okay, where is this going?’” she explained. Just months prior to the breakup, they had even discussed potential engagement rings, which Kirkconnell viewed as positive signs of commitment.
Yet, the mood shifted dramatically during their trip to Tokyo, where the dinner incident triggered emotions they hadn't anticipated might surface. Kirkconnell expressed confusion over why James questioned her ability to manage emotional responses, especially when she was dealing with relatively minor stressors, stating, “If you get emotional about little things like this, what is going to happen when something really terrible happens?” It concluded with James expressing doubts about their future together, telling her he didn’t see her as his “perfect” partner, and fearing she might end up resenting him if he prolonged their relationship without being fully committed.
Kirkconnell, reflecting on their years together, said, “After four years you should know or you should feel ready. We probably shouldn’t be together if you don’t feel like it after all this time.” The accounts she shared on the podcast revealed how deeply their breakup affected her emotionally, stating, “There are days I can barely get out of bed because I miss him so much.” Nevertheless, she clarified there was no infidelity on either side, asserting firmly, “Matt was faithful throughout our relationship.”
The dramatic fallout has also impacted their families and friends, who were reportedly left just as confused by the breakup, eager to seek clarification around such a sudden announcement. A source close to Kirkconnell noted, “She thinks it’s just as weird as everyone else does. She’s humiliated by how the news came out.” Despite this turmoil, Kirkconnell appears to be focused on healing and creating personal peace. She mentioned she is taking things “one day at a time” and emphasizes her desire to protect her well-being during this time.
This latest podcast appearance where she discussed their split aired just days ago, as Kirkconnell continues to navigate through the aftermath of the breakup. The shocking details surrounding the split between Rachael Kirkconnell and Matt James reflect the complex dynamics often found within relationships, particularly under the public gaze of reality TV fandom. The story has not only captivated their followers but also ignites reflections on expectations within partnerships, the challenges of maintaining private matters amid public scrutiny, and the emotional weight carried by both parties.