Hilaria Baldwin, the wife of actor Alec Baldwin, has opened up about her controversial fluctuating Spanish accent in her new memoir, Manual Not Included, revealing that her neurodivergent conditions, including ADHD and dyslexia, have significantly impacted her speech and language abilities. This disclosure comes after years of public scrutiny regarding her background and accent, which many have criticized as inconsistent and inauthentic.
The controversy surrounding Hilaria Baldwin began in 2020 when it was revealed that she was not born and raised in Spain, as she had often suggested, but instead grew up in Boston. This revelation led to accusations of cultural appropriation and an intense backlash that has haunted her for the past five years. Baldwin, who was born Hillary, has since shared that she spent holidays in Spain but did not grow up there, complicating her narrative.
In her memoir, Baldwin writes, “I have ADHD and dyslexia, and these [diagnoses] greatly impact my speech, my reading, my listening, my focus, my memory and my self-confidence.” She elaborated on her unique cognitive processing, describing her brain as “one part English, one part Spanish, seven dollops of mom brain, a heavy pour of distraction.” This explanation aims to contextualize her language fluctuations, which have often led to confusion and criticism from the public.
Reflecting on the toll the backlash has taken on her mental health, Baldwin confessed, “I was confused. I felt lost. I missed my family. I couldn't eat. I got very thin. I started to question my sanity. I started to question if I was a good person.” She shared that the intense scrutiny made her feel as though she was unraveling, leading her to darker thoughts about her worth and identity.
Hilaria Baldwin also praised her husband Alec for his support during these challenging times, stating, “Alec was so good to me throughout this time.” She noted that he could empathize with her struggles, having faced his own public challenges. Baldwin highlighted that the couple's relationship has been tested, particularly during her pregnancy with their second child, Rafael, in 2015. During this time, she felt isolated as Alec continued to work, even during her labor.
In her memoir, Baldwin recounts how their marriage faced rocky moments, with her considering divorce due to the stress of juggling motherhood and her husband's demanding career. “That year was probably the rockiest for us,” she wrote, explaining that she took off her rings to signal her readiness to walk away from the marriage. However, the couple ultimately persevered and has since welcomed five more children.
Hilaria Baldwin has been candid about her struggles with identity, particularly in the context of her fluctuating accent and cultural background. She argues that speaking both English and Spanish does not make her “inauthentic”; instead, it reflects her multifaceted identity. During the first episode of her reality show with Alec, she stated, “It makes me normal.”
Despite the backlash, Baldwin has attempted to reclaim her narrative. She expressed frustration over the public's reaction to her forgetting the word “cucumber” during an appearance on The Today Show, calling it “ridiculous” for anyone to be outraged by such a moment. “Can you be honest right now, reading this: Have you ever forgotten a word?” she challenged her readers.
In her memoir, Baldwin also draws parallels between her situation and that of male soccer players who adapt their accents when they move between teams in different countries. She suggests that the intense scrutiny she faces may be partly due to her gender, stating, “It isn’t just malice and ignorance that led to the insanity I experienced; it really was about a woman and her voice.”
Hilaria Baldwin's memoir, Manual Not Included, not only addresses her accent controversy but also delves into personal stories about motherhood, her marriage, and the challenges of life in the public eye. She reflects on the impact of the Rust shooting, where her husband accidentally shot and killed cinematographer Halyna Hutchins, and how it affected their family dynamic and public perception.
Throughout the book, Baldwin aims to present a more relatable version of herself, sharing anecdotes from her life that range from humorous to heartbreaking. She describes her experiences with pregnancy loss, her journey with motherhood, and the complexities of raising a large family in the spotlight. Baldwin emphasizes the importance of embracing one’s identity and the challenges that come with being a public figure.
As she navigates the tumultuous waters of public perception and personal struggles, Hilaria Baldwin hopes that her story will resonate with others who feel misunderstood or judged. Her memoir serves as a testament to her resilience and a reminder that everyone has their own battles to fight.
With the release of Manual Not Included, Hilaria Baldwin seeks to reclaim her narrative and redefine her identity beyond the controversies that have defined her public persona. As she puts it, “I just existed in a land where sometimes I spoke one language and sometimes I spoke another.”
In the end, Baldwin’s story is one of perseverance, self-discovery, and the ongoing quest for authenticity in a world that often demands conformity.
