Chulpan Khamatova, the acclaimed Russian actress, has recently found herself at the center of public scrutiny after leaving her homeland for Latvia. Since she emigrated shortly after the onset of Russia's military operations, Khamatova has expressed her feelings surrounding the criticism she faces for her decision.
"If I hadn't left, I could have lost myself or turned to alcohol," Khamatova said during her recent interview with Anton Dolin. Her comments, which provide insight not only about her mental health but also about the broader emotional turmoil many face during times of upheaval, reflect her deep sense of urgency in making the decision to leave.
Reluctance from acquaintances to support her decision flashing before her eyes is part of the emotional burden she carries. "They said: 'You're foolish, you're naive, where are you going? You're going to ruin your life,'" she recounted, sharing the disbelief and challenge she faced from those close to her. Despite their concerns, Khamatova stressed the importance of prioritizing herself and her well-being.
Moving to Latvia, Khamatova confronted additional obstacles. Initially struggling to find work, she faced the stark reality of adapting to life without the language skills necessary to navigate her new environment. It wasn't just about finding roles; the cultural transition itself proved challenging.
Nonetheless, she continues to battle the perception crafted by some media outlets and public figures, who seem intent on pitting her against her peers back home. "People, the media, and some public figures are always trying to pit me against others. I find it very upsetting," Khamatova remarked, highlighting the unnecessary comparison game presented by the press.
Despite the challenges, Khamatova remains firm about not judging those who choose to stay back or their decisions. "I have no right to condemn people who remain in Russia," she emphasized. This sentiment of unity and shared experiences, even across borders, is integral to her message.
Khamatova may have left the physical confines of Russia, but she insists her ties with her past are still very much intact. She maintains friendships with numerous colleagues who continue to work within the Russian theater and film industries. Yet, she refrains from naming them for fear they might face repercussions due to public or media scrutiny.
Throughout her time living abroad, she has reflected on her former life, often speaking with nostalgia but also criticism of the prevailing circumstances back home. Her departure after 24 years with the Sovremennik Theater was her way of seeking not just safety, but also the freedom to express her art without fear or pressure.
Despite the challenges of her new life, Khamatova remains active. She participates with her troupe, touring across Europe, though she occasionally faces roles less glamorous than she enjoyed before her departure. Now perceived as playing more whimsical characters like ladybugs and cacti, her past stardom seems like both a fading memory and a haunting reminder of what once was.
Looking back, Khamatova has called the media's approach disheartening and blames them for exacerbated feelings of isolation. "It’s hurtful to be compared to others when I have friendships with them," she reiterated, calling attention to the unfortunate tendency of some to create divisions among artists.
Currently, Khamatova contemplates her next steps, acknowledging the uncertainty yet confident she made the right choice. Keeping her well-being at the forefront, she feels empowered by her decision to put herself first. "What if I got eroded? I wouldn't exist anymore," she noted, summing up her resolve to survive and thrive, away from the familiar confines of her homeland.
Reflecting on her transformative three years since leaving Russia, Khamatova offers encouragement to others facing similar dilemmas—a reminder of the importance of forging one's path and the power of resilience when confronted with adversity. Khamatova's story serves as both cautionary and hopeful, enveloped within the volatility of current geopolitical climates and personal struggles.