Ava DuVernay is opening up about her decision to forgo marriage and motherhood, reflecting on how others have reacted to her choice over the years. During her recent appearance on the Audible interview series The Unusual Suspects, hosted by Kenya Barris and Malcolm Gladwell, the acclaimed filmmaker, known for her work on projects like Selma and A Wrinkle in Time, shared her thoughts candidly.
When asked if she would change her life choices if she could begin her career anew, DuVernay confidently replied, "No. I’ve never been a… he’s speaking of the fact I am not married and I don’t have children." At 52, she explained her reasoning, noting, "I don’t feel like I would be a good mother for a child. I don’t want to do this and I think, in the most ideal scenario, you should want to do this. I just don’t want to.
DuVernay’s reflections resonate deeply with many professionals facing similar life choices. Growing up as the oldest of five siblings, she noted her extensive experience with children did not spark the desire to have her own. "My family, my mom, would always say, for a little before she realized I was serious, ‘You’ll change your mind,’" she recalled, indicating her mother's misguided hopes for her to eventually embrace motherhood.
DuVernay also touched on the idea of marriage, expressing concerns over how it might limit her ability to pursue her career. "Marriage, for me, feels like it would make me act in ways that's too conventional," she said. Her commitment to her work often requires her to spend lengthy periods on filming locations, such as her experiences shooting with helicopters atop mountains in New Zealand. She reflected, "These are not traditional things for a woman."
Addressing whether her choices have complicated romantic relationships, DuVernay asserted, "No, because I’m not asking for [a partner]. If you’re seeking a traditional relationship where someone stays by your side as you chase your dreams, it might be tougher. But that's not what I'm seeking." This sentiment poignantly highlights her prioritization of personal autonomy and professional ambition over conventional relationship dynamics.
Her decision not to marry and not to have children has allowed DuVernay to embrace her career fully, elevates her work, and enables her to enjoy her successes later in life. Reflecting on this, she mentioned, "I didn’t have kids by choice, and I’m not married by choice. I was able to embrace my career later in life, in my 30s. So I’m going to do what feels good to me, and I’m going to have fun.”
Diving more deeply, industry studies show nearly 40% of women in leadership positions within entertainment prioritize career advancement over traditional family structures. DuVernay embodies this trend, having made substantial strides over her two-decade career.
Her work has transformed modern cinema and opened doors for countless filmmakers, particularly creative voices from minority backgrounds. Through her production company, ARRAY, DuVernay has been behind over 30 independent films, driving diversity and inclusion within Hollywood.
DuVernay’s honest discourse about career-centric life choices not only reflects her personal beliefs but also highlights the broader shifts occurring within the entertainment industry. Her anecdotes have sparked important conversations about work-life balance and the societal expectations women face.
Her impact extends beyond just her narratives; by mentoring upcoming talent, DuVernay plays an instrumental role in reshaping Hollywood’s power dynamics, particularly for women and people of color. The candid revelations during her interview have challenged preconceived notions about marriage and children, igniting discourse around personal fulfillment.
With her groundbreaking projects, DuVernay continues to redefine what success looks like, both on and off-screen—an inspiring reminder of the variety of paths available to women today.