When Ryan Libbey, known to many as a former star of Made In Chelsea, first pictured fatherhood, he imagined the usual mix of sleepless nights, nappy changes, and the joy of watching his son Leo grow. But as so often happens, life had other ideas. Shortly after Leo’s birth, Ryan’s partner, Louise, suffered life-threatening health complications that left her hospitalized. Suddenly, Ryan found himself thrust into the role of primary caregiver—not just for his newborn son, but for Louise as well. "I was doing every night time, every change… every walk. The role of both mum and dad," Ryan told BBC's Parenting Download.
For nearly a year, Ryan juggled the relentless demands of parenthood and caregiving. The emotional and physical toll was immense. After 11 months, he hit a wall. Burnout set in, and the sense of isolation became overwhelming. It was then, on a park bench, that a simple conversation with his own father changed everything. As Ryan recalls, his dad looked at him and said, "You’re not in a good spot. You need some help. How can I help you?" Those words cracked open the door to honesty, vulnerability, and, ultimately, recovery.
This moment of connection was more than just a lifeline for Ryan—it was a reminder of the power of intergenerational wisdom. As BBC reported, the advice and support from fathers and older male mentors can offer a sense of grounding and reassurance, especially when new parents face periods of uncertainty and self-doubt. Ryan’s experience, while deeply personal, echoes a broader reality for many men navigating the uncharted waters of new fatherhood.
According to England’s most recent men’s health strategy, the statistics are striking: between 5-15% of fathers experience anxiety before and after the birth of a child, and 5-10% face depression. Yet, as clinical psychologist Dr. Jill Domoney told BBC, men often feel they are "not a legitimate person to be asking for help"—especially when compared to mothers and babies. This reluctance is rooted in long-standing social expectations that men should be stoic providers, the proverbial "harbour wall that just gets smashed and remains standing every time," as Ryan put it.
But, as both experts and lived experience attest, this silence can be damaging. Ryan’s story is a case in point. It wasn’t until he opened up—to his father, and later to Louise—that he realized the importance of emotional connection. Taking a few days abroad, away from the pressure cooker of home, gave him perspective. He returned with a new understanding of what his partner needed: not just practical support, but emotional presence. "I realised I’d missed what she was yearning for—holding her hand and listening to her," he reflected.
Now, Ryan has taken these lessons to heart. Each week, he writes letters to Leo, chronicling his journey as a father—the struggles, the joys, and the hard-won insights. He hopes that, one day, Leo will read them and gain a deeper understanding of emotions, vulnerability, and the choices his father made. It’s a move that, as El Balad notes, aims to help the next generation of men communicate more openly and make sense of their own parenting journeys.
Ryan’s openness has found resonance with others, including rapper and songwriter Professor Green, known offstage as Stephen Manderson. Stephen’s childhood was marked by trauma and the absence of consistent male parenting. Despite an "incredible" bond, his father struggled with his own demons and was in and out of Stephen’s life. Suppressing those feelings, Stephen says, led him down a path of unhealthy coping mechanisms—drink and drugs—as he tried to numb the pain. "You find your way to things that don’t help. They may temporarily change how you feel, but they will ultimately make things worse," he explained to BBC.
When Stephen’s father died by suicide, the loss was devastating. As a father himself now, he’s determined to break the cycle. His son Slimane, now four, is growing up in a home where emotional expression is encouraged. When tantrums loom, father and son "shake it out" together—a ritual for processing big feelings safely. "I’m better… sitting with things and dealing with things," Stephen says. The lessons he’s learned are woven into his parenting, ensuring Slimane receives the emotional security Stephen once lacked.
Both Ryan and Stephen are advocates for a new kind of masculinity—one that values vulnerability, open communication, and self-reflection. Their stories, as reported by Mix Vale, are helping to dismantle the stigma around men’s mental health and encouraging others to seek help. They emphasize that asking for support is not a sign of weakness, but a crucial step toward healthier parenting and stronger families.
Their advice for new dads is refreshingly practical: talk to someone if you’re feeling overwhelmed, whether it’s a friend, your partner, or a professional. Keep up with hobbies and activities that remind you of your identity outside of parenthood. Pay attention to your physical health—eat well, exercise, and grab sleep when you can. Connect with other new dads to share the messy, real experiences of fatherhood. And above all, remember that looking after yourself is the best way to look after your family.
The challenges facing new fathers are real and, as the experts stress, often under-recognized. The pressures of being a provider, the sleep deprivation, the shifting identity, and the weight of expectations can all take a toll. But with robust support systems, open dialogue, and the courage to seek help, fathers can navigate these challenges and emerge more resilient—for themselves and their children.
As 2025 draws to a close, the stories of Ryan Libbey and Professor Green serve as a timely reminder: parenting is a journey of growth, not just for children, but for parents too. By facing their pain, changing how they communicate, and learning to regulate themselves, they’re not just surviving—they’re thriving, and lighting the way for others to do the same.
