Tamzin Outhwaite Shares Her Journey Of Loss And Renewal

For decades, British actress Tamzin Outhwaite has been a familiar face on television screens, captivating audiences with her performances in shows like EastEnders, Murder Before Evensong, and New Tricks. But behind the glamour and the roles, Outhwaite’s off-screen life has been marked by profound personal transformation, resilience in the face of loss, and a candid embrace of midlife’s many challenges. As she appeared on ITV’s Love Your Weekend on February 1, 2026, the 55-year-old star’s openness about grief, motherhood, menopause, and advocacy for women’s wellbeing has struck a chord with many.

Outhwaite’s journey through grief began with the sudden loss of her mother, Anna Santis, who died of a heart attack in April 2018 at the age of 67 while living in Spain. According to Entertainment Daily, the shock of her mother’s passing left an indelible mark. On the second anniversary of Anna’s death in April 2020, Tamzin shared a heartfelt tribute on Instagram, posting a collage of her mother alongside an emotional caption: “Two years ago today, we lost you. Mum, you have no idea how much you are missed. How many lives you touched and how proud I am of you.”

The sense of loss, Outhwaite revealed, is ever-present. “You have taught me so much, and I strive to be like you, Mum. What a lucky girl I was growing up with you as my guide,” she wrote, underscoring the profound influence Anna had on her life. The pain of her absence became especially acute on Mother’s Day 2020, when Tamzin admitted, “It’s been far tougher than I could ever have imagined. I struggled with holding back tears in front of [my children], knowing when they see me cry, they cry.”

Even years later, the grief lingers. On the BBC’s Freeze The Fear with Wim Hof in 2022, Outhwaite confessed to fellow participants Gabby Logan and Chelcee Grimes, “I thought she would always be alive. She’d be the last person to go. I do still now think she is living in Spain, where she was, and happy. I just pretend, in my head.” Her candor about the enduring nature of grief has resonated with many who have experienced similar losses.

While grappling with personal sorrow, Outhwaite has also navigated the complexities of motherhood. She shares two children, Flo, now 17, and Marnie, 12, with her ex-husband Tom Ellis. Flo was born in 2008 and Marnie followed in 2012, when Tamzin was 41. In a 2014 interview with The Huffington Post, she addressed the notion of being an “older” mum: “I suppose 40 is considered 'old' to be a mum again, but I certainly don't feel like an older mum. You're as young as you feel and I feel great. I know parents who had babies much older than 40. It hasn't been a problem for us at all.”

Parenting, however, has brought its own share of growth and reckoning. In 2025, Outhwaite spoke publicly about her eldest child’s transition. On the Parenting Hell podcast, she revealed, “I've got two kids, and I did have two daughters and now I have a son and a daughter, and that's quite easy for me to say now, but it wasn't maybe six or seven years ago. To see him thriving is just nothing but relief and joy for me, really, because there were some dark times.”

Her honesty extended to her initial reactions. “The way I reacted at the very beginning, I would love to change because I think until you're going through it yourself with your child, it's very difficult to judge other people or to judge a situation because you don't expect that to happen to you or your child. What I did initially, I was like, 'Don't be ridiculous.' I didn't say it out loud, but my mind went to, 'That's ludicrous,' and I had to work back from that, talking it through.”

Despite the challenges, Tamzin’s relationship with her children has deepened over the years. “I would say that we have become a lot closer over the last few years, and I think that that happens naturally before they fly the nest,” she shared on the podcast. The bond between Flo and Marnie has also been a source of strength. Marnie, in particular, was a steadfast supporter of Flo’s transition, referring to Flo as her brother since she was just six. “Marnie has been the most insightful about all of it because it's constantly, from pretty much day one, when Marnie was six years old, has said, 'This is my brother Flo.' Flo has many nicknames at school, all sorts of different things, all of the kids are so accepting of everything, but I think they're much more understanding.”

Outhwaite’s reflections on family life are punctuated by memories of her children’s early years. She once described to The Huffington Post the joy of watching Flo read to Marnie, calling it “incredible” to see Flo “finding the right sounds and recognising words.”

As she moved through the trials of motherhood and loss, Outhwaite faced yet another life-altering transition: menopause. Now 55, she believes she entered perimenopause at 48, but the symptoms hit her forcefully on her 50th birthday in 2021. “My eyesight went when I turned 50, literally the day I turned 50,” she told Essex Life. “I was like, 'why can't I see?'” The physical changes were accompanied by brain fog, anxiety, and a sense of being overwhelmed. “I knew, when I hit perimenopause, I knew that I couldn't juggle everything I was juggling. I just couldn't keep it all going. Brain fog, overwhelmed, the overwhelm of having so much responsibility and anxiety.”

Sleep disturbances became routine. “Four o'clock in the morning awake, every night,” she recalled. Recognizing the toll these symptoms were taking, Outhwaite turned to a combination of hormone replacement therapy (HRT) and a robust self-care routine. She credits yoga, box breathing, meditation, sauna, cold water therapy, improved nutrition, and reduced alcohol intake with helping her manage the ups and downs. “I'm obsessed with the sauna now. Sauna and cold water, sauna and cold water. So that is something I do four times a week at least.”

Her experience with alcohol and menopause was particularly eye-opening. As she told Closer magazine, “Your hormones change during menopause, but the calories and sugar in alcohol do have an effect. The day after drinking, your body craves sugar and carbs, so I was eating badly. Menopause and brain fog make you feel like you’re going slightly crazy, so not having the ups and downs alcohol brings definitely helps, because you don’t need brain fog and a hangover! I’m much clearer and focused.”

Yet Outhwaite acknowledges that managing menopause isn’t always straightforward. “I've been on HRT for years now, but I still get symptoms, I'll still wake up in the middle of the night sometimes.” The journey inspired her to co-found the non-profit We Free Women, which offers funded wellness retreats to those in need, including women navigating menopause. “You can't pour from an empty cup,” she said, emphasizing the importance of women supporting each other. “The power of a circle of women is intense. I think when you get women together like that, it really shows.”

Through grief, parenting, and personal reinvention, Tamzin Outhwaite’s story is one of continual adaptation and strength. Her willingness to share her struggles—and her triumphs—offers hope and solidarity to many walking similar paths.